Directors: Rob Robertson, Jim Wynorski
Cast: Corey Landis, Amy Rasimas, Rib Hillis, Lisa Clapperton, John Callaghan and David Carradine
Plot: Geneticists use agricultural science on animals, accidentally unleashing two deadly creatures onto an island’s population.
Today I decided to fully embrace the nature of B Movie Wednesday and subjected myself to one of Roger Corman’s standard efforts, Dinocroc vs. Super… I can’t even type it without groaning.
Right, let’s try and condense this into a plot. If I had to suffer it, so do you. David Carradine (clearly in this movie only because he does very little and can pick up a nice, juicy pay-check just for being David Carradine), is a nasty piece of work, who has an agricultural facility working on super-sized crops. However, he corrupts his lead scientists and convinces them to experiment on crocodiles and alligators, supposedly to research illnesses and potential cures. Of course, things go wrong and their two subjects mutate. Before you know it, Dinocroc and Supergator break out of their cells and escape into the wild, preying on ramblers and people who live on the outskirts of town. David Carradine’s Jason Drake has to send in shady military units and a hunter known only as the Cajun to hunt down the two animals, before his secret is leaked out. He doesn’t realise that an agent from the Agricultural committee is already on his tail, Drake’s experiments causing subtle suspicion. Teaming up with the island’s deputy, a bright young woman called Cassidy, he hopes to take down Drake’s company and hopefully find a way to destroy his two reptilian creations, before they make it off the island.
This movie’s problem (I am calling it ‘this movie’ from now on, because I’m not typing out that title again), is that it doesn’t really know what its audience wants. Sure, we are mainly here to see the two monsters in the title, because most of the viewers are roped into this flick out of pure curiosity to see what they look like. However, we want to be vaguely teased on the reveal. Supergator is first seen 30 seconds into this movie. By the 40th second, he has bagged his first kill. I wasn’t expecting a suspenseful opening, but this is embarrassingly poor judgement. Right there and then, everyone has just lost a massive reason to keep watching. I understand that the animation isn’t the best, so a reveal kept hidden for too long would have been anti-climatic, but a token effort at suspense and tension would be appreciated. This movie also seems to think that we are here to watch the two creatures kill as many people as possible, which turns dull very quickly. There is so much rubbish included in this movie to bulk out the running time, so it counts as a feature film. The amount of red shirts in this movie are horrendous. Characters are introduced only to be killed off moments later. I understand that this film is the kind of movie that racks up a high body count, but it doesn’t try to develop anyone. A stuck-up actor character is introduced in a scene and disappears. When he emerges later with two bimbos under each arm, the three of them are promptly slaughtered by the Dinocroc. He brings nothing to the story, but because he was introduced a while before he is killed, we assume he is a key role to watch out for. The same goes for several other characters. There are moments in this movie where you end up distancing yourself from events, because you know the character you are focusing on is meaninglessly going to be killed off in a few moments. In fact, you end up losing touch with the leads, because you don’t ever think to trust them to be alive in a few scenes time. If any of the kills were worth watching, it might be forgivable, but sadly, they are all just a messy CGI gore-fest.
The final twenty minutes does become bearable, saving this film from a disastrous rating. There isn’t really anyone to compliment for this; the movie just runs out of red herrings and distractions, forcing it to focus on story and character. The leads decide to bottle the two monsters in together and let them duke it out. This isn’t so much of a spoiler, because that is pretty much what the title tells you will happen. The three main leads aren’t awful to spend time with. The Cajun is a brooding bad-ass, although he lacks much characterisation. Cassidy the cop is held back by her role as the female piece of eye candy, but compared to the other female actresses on show here, Amy Rasimas doesn’t offend anyone with corny acting. Best of them is the lead hero, mainly because Corey Landis accepts the fact that this movie is one big joke. He chew scenery and the script pokes fun at his character, which actually helps this movie more than you would have thought. Then there is the fight between the two CGI monsters. It could have been better, but the special effects team obviously have their hands tied with a little budget. It would have been nice to see the two creatures have an extended duel, especially as most of the early scenes are spent on red herring heroes and pointless kills, but when your expectations have dropped this low, you accept it and call it a day.
Final Verdict: There are a handful of neat moments, but otherwise, this is exactly the confusing mess that the title hints it is.
Sounds awful, where do I find a copy?
I appreciate the kind words.
No problem. I really enjoyed your performance in this.
Like…how were you even made aware of this? Also, look at you, getting one of the stars of the movie to comment on here!
Yeah, I know, right. Critically acclaimed or what?